Home > Yellow w/ White Trim > Ebay, my moral compass

Ebay, my moral compass

Let me begin this post by saying that I love my son.

Now let me say that I gritted my teeth a whole bunch tonight.  Dana is out of town on business, and I remembered last minute that I had not made arrangements for Alex after school while I went to a class I’m auditing at Western Seminary.  So, midday I called a friend who was willing to pick him up from school and drop him off at our childcare provider until after my class.

When I came to pick him up I learned that he had been, for lack of a better word, horrendous.  He caused a lot of damage with his sharp little tongue in his brief hour and a half.  Enough so that I had to count much higher than 10 frequently all evening long.

It’s painful for me.  Yes because I hate knowing that my son will have to learn the hard way about his mouth.  Yes because I can see myself in him at that age (I helped a lot of Sunday School teachers retire).  Yes because this is my friend who cares for my children on a regular basis, and I hate that my child, whom she loves dearly, would return harshness for the love she gives him so freely.

But mostly it’s painful for me because I feel a bit like a failure.  It’s my pride, if I’m honest.  Of course I want my child to grow into the calling he’s received.  Of course I want him to show love in the face of hatred and peace in the face of hostility and honesty in the face of deceit.  But if I’m honest, I am unfortunately concerned too much for the name he carries with him to school and amongst friends: Daniels.  It reflects on me.

I see myself here.  I see what you are probably thinking: Come on Daniels!  The kid is 7 and you need to get over yourself.  Quit being a prideful, arrogant jerk.  Ok.  Well-repremanded.  Just thought I would be honest with you and say that I do not miss the larger thing here (and yes, it’s about me again – no need to point out my excessive navel-gazing): I carry a name with me inside and outside the house, in my job and in my parenting: Christ.  “O to be like Thee.”

In Germany a couple lost custody of their 7-month old child after jokingly trying to sell him on Ebay for one Euro.  Ebay, thank you for being a moral compass for me today.  Without you and the poor jokers who learned a tough lesson, I might have made the same mistake today.

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  1. September 13, 2010 at 9:25 pm

    Hey Jim. We’ve all been there. My three sons attend school where my husband teaches. I understand your pain!

  2. Dave Wingert
    September 15, 2010 at 8:06 am

    Jim:
    I feel your pain. You well know some of the struggles we have had with our boys. They haven’t gotten any better since you moved away. As my Mom once told me, “You wouldn’t be the first parent who was about ready to throw the kids out the window!” I too have struggled with the pride issue and worried about what others will think about my parenting skills. The best advice I ever got was “God is the perfect Father – He does everything right. Yet we as his children still do sinful things”

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